Wedding Speeches

"Public speaking" is often listed as the number one phobia today, ahead even of fear of flying, heights and spiders. Not surprising then that something as important as a wedding day speech can be such a terrifying prospect. Many people would probably prefer to fall out of an aircraft from a great height into a nest of giant spiders!

List of Speeches

There's no "fixed" order of reception speeches and toasts. Here's one common example, there are many variations:

Father of the Bride
Welcomes the guests, talks about the bride, proposes a toast to the health and happiness of the bride and groom
Groom
Thanks the parents, talks about the bride, proposes a toast to the bridesmaids
Best Man
Thanks the parents for the reception, reads telegrams, talks about the groom, proposes a toast to the bride and groom

This all male line-up is increasingly giving way to a more flexible arrangement with speeches also made by the bride, mothers of the couple and even bridesmaids. Whilst equality of the sexes in speech making is welcome there is an argument that some weddings today have far too many speeches.

Ideas

I remember my one and only experience as best man and it was truly scary giving the speech. Fortunately everything went well - and it probably will for you as well. It sounds trite but try to relax, the chances are that everyone in the room is there to enjoy themselves. They're all on your side.

Perhaps the most important piece of advice I was given: offend nobody. It's considered traditional for the best man to make some embarrassing comments about the groom's past but think carefully about these. The revelations might be funny to you, but how will the bride receive them? Will your blue joke about the stripper go down well with the groom's grandmother? What about the young bridesmaids in the room? If in doubt, err on the side of caution.

There are many books you can buy with best man speeches to adopt. I'd suggest not just taking them directly, they're unlikely to sound natural coming from you. Instead treat them as sources of inspiration and ideas to put together your own unique speech.

Oh, and avoid resorting to "Dutch courage" to help you get through!

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